


It's alright

by MarieITNO98



Category: SKAM (Italy)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Love, M/M, We are in this together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-01-14
Packaged: 2019-10-10 02:52:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17417651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarieITNO98/pseuds/MarieITNO98
Summary: Marti wakes up in the middle of the night and has to comfort Nico.





	It's alright

**Author's Note:**

> I really feel like the Skam Italia fandom is one of the most supportive and loving fandoms I've ever been a part of. Every work I've read on here or on tumblr shows how much people love these characters.   
> I decided to write my own little fic about Nicotino, since I love them with all my heart.  
> English is not my mother tongue, so I apologize for any mistakes :-)   
> I hope you like it <3

The sunflowers were beautiful. He was standing in a field under the warm sun looking at all the yellow flowers in front of him. Suddenly one of the sunflower turned to him, "Martino, wake up." He blinked. Huh? He tried to walk away but the sunflower had arms and grabbed him by the wrist.  
"Wake up."   
Was his mind playing tricks on him? Was this a nightmare?   
"Marti?"   
Martino opened one eye. His brain was still clouded with sleep and he was too tired to open the other eye.   
"Marti, please."   
Now he could feel someone shaking him. "Marti?"   
"Nico?" he could finally open his eyes and pushed himself up on his elbows. It was still dark, probably very early in the morning.  
He reached for the lamp on his nightstand and switched it on. He turned around to face his boyfriend. Nico was sitting crosslegged next to him, his thick black hair was messy and his green eyes were wide. His chest was heaving and he was drawing in rattling, aprupt breaths.  
"Nico, are you okay?"   
Martino knew that look on the other boy's face all too well. Nico was biting his lower lip and blinking rapidly. He could see that he was about to nod but then he shook his head instead.   
Marti scooted over to him. "What is wrong? Did you have a nightmare?"   
"I feel like..." Nico stopped, he made a strangled sound, chest still heaving. "I feel like I can't breathe, my whole body hurts."   
"Where does it hurt?" Marti's thoughts were racing, suddenly he was wide awake. "Should I call my mom?"  
He wasn't a doctor and the only thing he knew how to handle was a common cold.   
Nico shook his head but his hand reached for Marti's and he held onto it as if his life depended on it. Marti could see tears welling in his green eyes.  
"Show me where it hurts, Ni." he tried to keep his voice quiet and steady. Don't panic. "Take a deep breath, look, like I am doing right now."  
Martino inhaled and exhaled a few times. Nico looked at him and the grib around his hand tightened, "I am sorry." his voice broke, "I am so sorry." He was breathing way too fast.   
"I can't, Marti, I can't'".  
Martino shook his head, "Just breathe, in and out. Easy, easy, there you go, focus on me, look me in the eye, Ni. There you go."  
Nico calmed down a bit but he was trembling and now Marti could see that his dark blue night sweatshirt was completely drenched in sweat.   
"Are you still in pain? Does your chest hurt?" Marti didn't know why he was suddenly so calm and collected, but an eerie calmness had overcome him.   
Nico nodded "My chest and stomach."   
Marti now knew what troubled Nico. He hadn't had a panic attack in years but what he remembered from the last one was the sharp pain in his chest and his overall body.   
"Keep breathing. In and out. There you go, you're doing great."   
"I am sorry, Marti. I am sorry I woke you up. I just-."  
"Hey, "Marti squeezed his hand, "It's alright. Don't worry."  
After around five more minutes of just sitting opposite of each other and breathing in sync, Nico's body finally relaxed.   
Marti could hear it in his breaths. The hand that had been gripping his got limp and his shoulders sank down.   
They sat there for a while. Knees touching, Nico avoiding Marti's gaze and arms wrapped around his knees.  
Silent tears were running down his cheeks, dropping onto the bedsheets. Nico tried to wipe them away. Marti's heart almost broke at the sight of it. He gave Nico space,to not pressure him, even though it physically hurt to see him so tortured.   
Then Nico leaned against him,, slowly as if he was afraid. He put his head on Marti's shoulder and let himself cry. And Marti held him, gently rocking him side to side.  
"Schhhh, schhhh. I am here, I am here. You're okay." drawing soothing circles on his back, feeling the muscle relax more and more under his touch.   
Nico buried his face in the crook of his neck.   
"Do you wanna let me in, Ni?" Martino asked eventually. Nico gave a weak nod.  
And then he told him about his panic attacks. That he often had them when he was stressed or when an episode was looming ahead. That he was afraid Martino would leave him. How he couldn't help but think everyone would abandon him.. That he was useless. How he sometimes hated his body, hated his mind. Envied people who hadn't had the same issues. How we wished to have a normal life. How his grades in school suffered. That he feared he could never fulfill his dreams...  
...how much he loved Marti... 

The first sunlight was filtering through the curtains when Nico stopped talking. They had crawled under the blanket at one time, arms wrapped around each other.   
"I had a panic attack when my dad threatend to leave my mom for the first time. I don't know how old I was but what I remember is this feeling of drowning. You don't have to be ashamed, I am here to help you, okay?" Marti whispered in Nico's hair and inhaled the scent of him, it felt like coming home, it grounded him. "You know that you are the most amazing person I know, right? You are so incredibly smart and I will never be tired of hearing your new ideas or thoughts. Your mind is wonderful, Nico. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I don't care what others think. We are in this together. I would even steal giraffes with you."   
Nico's lips curled into a small smile.   
He went on to talk about giraffes. How he liked their long necks and their big eyes and when he looked down Nico was asleep. Head resting on Martino's chest, one arm wrapped around his stomach, breathing slowly in and out.  
Martino's mamma found them like this one hour later. Both fast asleep.

**Author's Note:**

> I am not a doctor but I have had several panicattacks and they absolutely suck.   
> I have a speech disorder, I stutter and I can never say what I want when I want it. It feels like there is a brick wall in front of your mouth and you can't breathe and your whole body tenses up. I have been bullied because of it and sometimes it feels like I will never be able to achieve my dreams and that others will always judge me. I can imagine that Nico has the same demons....   
> Thank you so much for reading <3 
> 
> Feel free to leave a kudo or a comment <3


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